THINKING OF MOM

Couldn’t stop thinking about my mother yesterday. It was her birthday and she would’ve been 88.

Mom passed away in 2001 (pancreatic cancer), but I still get the urge every once in a while to pick up the phone and call her. Yesterday I had that urge, but since that can’t happen anymore, I just said out loud “HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MOM” as soon as I woke up that morning.

I wrote several poems after she died.  It was a time when a lot of thoughts were running around in my head (and heart)–about life, about love, about saying farewell to a mom who I thought would always be there for me.  Later, I found out that in many ways she still is.

FINE DETAILS

We act
like nothing has changed.
But you are no longer performing.
Fears of inevitable departure
have been realized.

Time flies.
A shooting star
passed brightly over the darkest stage
the night that you released
your last breath here.

Leaves me
wondering; pondering why
fine details go by unrecognized—
revealed only after
the curtains are drawn.

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2 Responses to THINKING OF MOM

  1. Ann Everett says:

    Hi Cathy,
    If I was a poet, which I’m not, I could write poems about my 88 year old mom and how she’s still here physically, but I lost her a while ago mentally. I spent the day with her today at the nursing home. She still knows me…most days, but just about all of what she says makes no sense. I, like you, just always thought Momma and Daddy would be here…even though logically I knew they wouldn’t.
    I enjoyed your post and poems. Memories are a true blessing.

    • Cathy says:

      Thanks for your comment, Ann. When my mom was on her last days in a hospice house, she didn’t always know who we were, but just being close had its blessings. Love goes beyond words and human understanding and I share some of my thoughts on that in my upcoming book through one of the characters. As we both know, we authors tend to draw on our own personal experiences, mix them up (or together), and then include them in our stories. Yes, memories are beautiful, I agree!

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